Refudiating the Grate American Patdown...America's Biggest Public Sex Scandal To Date...
By
Micheline Birger
Don't Ask - Don't Tell has now hit airline travel. They now have three lines for Pat-Downs. Gay - Straight & Undecided. If you refudiate any of the above choices, then you can get irradiated. Why bother, I wonder, why even bother to fly anymore???
The TSA is insistent on enforcing "Junk Touching Measures" despite citizen's protest. Pubic sex is now allowed at American Airports under the guise of National Security. Indeed, all the world is a stage...we have the world laughing at our nationwide hysteria...the great Canadian humorist - Stephan Leacock once wrote - "Let me hear the jokes of a nation and I will tell you what they are about and going through." Yes I do believe we have gone stark raving mad...zzzzzzzzzz.....so what else is new darling???
We do co-exist in a Rodney Dangerfield Society - don't we? Prez Dude can't and doesn't get any respect...Throw Nancy from the Train Pelosi...now demoted to Senate Minority Leader gets no respect - folks say because of all that Botox she's been getting all these years to give her that vacant-empty-emotionless-robotic look...Charlie Rangel, (D) of New York, got slammed with 11 ethics violations this past week...things he's done in office...I hear he'll be collecting on his markers before his sentencing...
Hilary flatly denies-denies-denies running for Madame Prez in 2012..."I love my job"...Donald Trump says No-No-No for a Presidential Bid...if he did run I wonder which party he would represent? Heck, it doesn't matter...he'd have every one's pink slips passed out at his Inauguration....Sorry, but you've been given the chance of running the business of the USA...You're Fired!
The press is busy-busy-busy dancing around Sarah Palin...does she or doesn't she want to run? And is her Alaska Show a roundabout ploy to get her in the Presidential seat even though Barbara Bush thinks that "she ought to stay in Alaska." Why not have a dial-in-vote to see what America thinks. 1-888-VOTE-SARAH...
Speaking of Alaska...the Senate Race is still not settled to the candidates' satisfaction...Tea Party Candidate Joe Miller & incumbent Lisa Murkowski are still in the lurch...up to this moment the whole declaration of the winner is on hold because Joe wants a recount - it is a legal challenge - whether misspelling vs. intention actually does count as a vote...stay tuned to Part III of all the folks in Alaska who can vote but can't spell dilemma...hey, I don't blame any of them for duking it out...Washington D.C. is like the tropics during those cold winters in Alaska...
Speaking of the those who may or may not run...Gov. Tim Pawlenty (R) is unsure as to whether to throw his hat in the ring for El Presidente in 2012...if he chooses to opt out...he'll be moving to Florida. He will open a MargaritaVille Bar...wear flowered shirts...Kenny Chesney music will infuse the background...sounds like a plan Tim...I'd opt for the bar...Don't Worry Be Happy with a flowered shirt has a better ring to it...
So in the meantime the press is busy scouting around for all the best Prez Candidates for the next big Mud-Slugging Fest Cycle...it's all up in the air...this one has a good barber - that one doesn't...that one can't win because of their religion...she's a woman and everybody but everyone knows that politicks in America is sexist-sexist-sexist...will Hilary run with Barack? Is Barack dumping Joe for Hilary? Or will Hilary run on her own? Could she derail the current Big-Spender-In-Chief??? Yada-Yada-Yada...
Everyone have a grand Turkey Day...and if so inclined you can go to confession before flying. "Bless me Father for I have not sinned...I was forced to cheat on my mate by having a patdown at the airport...unfortunately I just couldn't refudiate it...going to I will be going in the Straight Line...coming back, I think I will try the Undecided Line...I just want to feel what all the buzz is about"...remember Don't Ask - Don't Tell...
Gobble-Gobble...have a grate Holy Daze...and thank you for being a willing participant in the The Grate American PatDown...God, finally a sex scandal of sorts in the political arena...what would my character June say in my book EveryBody Lies About Their Sex Life? The Bisexual comedy writer..."Why be bipartisan when you can be bi-sex-u-al?"
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Love,
Micheline
Labels: refudiate;2012 elections;Sarah Palin;Don't Touch My Junk;TSA;political satire, Tea Party