Bitch-Slapping Campaign

By
Micheline Birger

Blame it on the July heat. Nobody can think straight. The Big-Spender-of-Other-People's-Money-in-the-White-House swore that he would never do "politicks as usual." Alas, he lied of course...he's miming what everybody else who wants the coveted seat in the Oral Office does. He gets down and dirty in the mass consciousness of this insane political bitch-slapping campaign. And this guy in the U.S. Prez's Office got the Nobel Peace Prize for what...exactly?

Is there such a thing as a High-Road to the White House? Is there such an ideology? Truthfully? I think not. The Media wants The Masses - you know - Them Asses to believe that the Current-Savior-in-Chief's pearly teleprompter words are gospel...just like his former minister - Jeremiah Wright's hate-mongering lectures on Sunday Mornings in Chicago...ah, the good ole daze...

But - that is all in the past...or is it? I wish that Barack and Mitt would get in a ring and box their way to the title - King of the Free World. Beat the truth out of each other. Get real - down and dirty...and when the dust settles, let the people decide who is the winner...by applause...like an applause-o-meter or a 1-800-VOTE-NOW number??? Hey, please laugh, it works on American Idol...oh, wait a minute...now would you be able to count all of the illegals that the Dems are trying to buy with welfare? Oh well, it was just a wild passing thought...

According to my sources at the Mass Consciousness Rumor Mill - Americans really do want change...they want for the guy at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave in D.C. to stop using the U.S. public as one big ATM machine in his pseudo-class-warfare-I-hate-rich-people stance. People are awakening out of their coma - It's Not The Party - it's The Economics. Folks are wanting and willing to cross the Party Lines to restore the American Spirit...not this cock'n'bull of creating more government to fix the problems. The government is the problem...they can't even balance your money or mine. Why on Earth would we, the Little People want more of the same with this guy???

But as long as Mass America keeps mesmerized by network news sponsored by Lie-A-Gra; Social Anxiety Disorder and Restless Leg Syndrome, the more things will remain the same. Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose. (Fr) The more things change, the more things remain the same. Or better yet, the more things remain the same, the more you should consider a change.

So let Mitt and Barack get into their shiny designer boxer shorts; helmets; gloves and mouth guards...and get down and dirty. Jump in the ring. Barack can call Mitt a Mormon. Mitt can call Barack a Muslim. Barack can get Mitt's tax records - Mitt can get Barack to cough up his real birth certificate...who's your Daddy, your real Daddy, Barack??? And where oh where were you born Barack? Indonesia, Kenya?

Barack can accuse Mitt of outsourcing jobs at Gain Capital...Mitt can ask to see all of the financial records for all of these Going Green companies that went bankrupt with taxpayer money under Barack's watch??? Barack can call Mitt a felon...Mitt can call Barack a Socialist-Marxist. Hey this can go on forever in this Bitch-Slapping Campaign...

So what is it that the U.S. people really, really, really want? They want to feel that their future is solid. They want to feel that they can be part of the American Dream...not a by-product of madmen-in-power's-political-agenda-for-global-world-domination just because they're so bored and don't know what else to do...

Hilary was right. Sound Bytes vs. Sound Solutions. We already know the problem. The problem is Narcissistic Maniacs who like to make other people miserable...God, why isn't a woman running? I know, that is sexist of me but hey - why isn't one? In the meantime we have to watch this arrogant Bitch-Slapping Campaign while the U.S. is still considered an economy. Oh, whoa is me! I wish these men would listen to Joan Rivers - Grow Up. Just Grow Up!

Support your local satire writer. Buy my books on Kindle.

XOXO
Micheline